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Author Archives: Chris Cane

Are you a Pilot or a Lesbian?

Posted on September 4, 2013 by Chris Cane

You think you have lived to be 80 plus and know who you are, then along comes someone and blows it all to hell! An old Marine Pilot sat down at the Starbucks, still wearing his old USMC flight jacket and ordered a cup of coffee. As he sat sipping his coffee, a young woman

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Posted in My Life |

How frequently should older folks have sex?

Posted on September 4, 2013 by Chris Cane

An older couple had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married. Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.

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Posted in My Life |

Some Wives are more Sensuous than Others?

Posted on August 30, 2013 by Chris Cane

With a very seductive voice the woman asked her husband,  “Have you ever seen Twenty dollars all crumpled up?” “No,” said her husband. She gave him a sexy little smile, unbuttoned the top 3 or 4 buttons of her blouse, and slowly reached down into the cleavage created by a soft, silkypush-upbra, and pulled out a crumpled Twenty

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Posted in Humor, My Life, Rare Miscellany |

Catholic Parrots

Posted on August 21, 2013 by Chris Cane

A lady goes to her priest one day and tells him, ‘Father, I have a problem. I have two female parrots, but they only know to say one thing’ ‘What do they say?’ the priest asked. They say, ‘Hi, we’re hookers! Do you want to have some fun?’ ‘That’s obscene!’ the priest exclaimed,  Then he thought

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Posted in Humor, Rare Miscellany |

Federal Avian Pathologist’s Report – Crow learns that 200 of his friends have passed away ignominiously.

Posted on August 15, 2013 by Chris Cane

  Don’t forget to read to the end because there is a really cool tune.   With all of today’s newscasters telling us about the flu epidemic and the hundreds who may die, a story has come to light one that Doctor Doom cannot possibly make up. It is not a pretty story…. it concerns over

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Posted in Humor, Rare Miscellany, Useful Stuff | Tags: Avian Flu, bob chapman, City Health Dept, crow, Doctor Doom, Federal Bird Pathologist, here come a truck, Ornithological Behaviorist, raven |

Burgers and Beer for the Siamese

Posted on August 14, 2013 by Chris Cane

Siamese twins walk into a bar and park themselves on a bar stool. Al says to the bartender, “Two beers please!” The bartender, feeling slightly awkward, tries to make polite conversation while pouring the beers. “Been on holiday yet?” “Off to England next month,” says Al. “We go to England every year, rent a car

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Posted in Humor | Tags: Beer, england |

Investment Tips for 2014 (Investing 101 Class)

Posted on August 13, 2013 by Chris Cane

For all of you with any money left, be aware of the next expected mergers so that you can get in on the ground floor and make some BIG bucks. Watch for these consolidations in 2014: Hale Business Systems, Mary Kay Cosmetics, Fuller Brush, and W. R. Grace Co. will merge and become: Hale, Mary,

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Posted in Humor, Rare Miscellany |

Shoot the damned bird.

Posted on August 5, 2013 by Chris Cane

Scientists at NASA have developed a gun built specifically to launch dead chickens at the windshields of airliners, military jets and the space shuttle, all traveling at maximum velocity. The idea is to simulate the frequent incidents of collisions with airborne fowl to test the strength of the windshields. British engineers heard about the gun

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Posted in Humor, My Life |

Stoopid is as Stoopid Does!

Posted on August 4, 2013 by Chris Cane

I did find this on Facebook done by some named “LMAO” I just had to copy it. In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed to stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods: On a Sears hairdryer — Do not use while sleeping. (Shoot, and that’s the only time

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Posted in Humor | Tags: stupid |

Now Chris Cane is Banned from Bigg’s Grocery Store in West Chester

Posted on August 4, 2013 by Chris Cane

Will it ever end? I guess this is a follow on story to the stories when I was banned from Kroger and than Walmart. It does appear that employees at grocery stores are very sensitive to unusual behavior. For example, I was in Bigg’s yesterday and … I don’t shop at Bigg’s often and I’m

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Posted in Humor, My Life | Tags: Homeland Security, Strip Down |

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