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Home » Humor » Will I ever get to Heaven? The Scottish Version.

Will I ever get to Heaven? The Scottish Version.

Posted on September 19, 2010 by Chris Cane

Scottish School Uniform

One of the things about being a person who likes to tell jokes and shares humor is that folks from my past send me stuff from time to time to make me smile as well. Here’s a short tale from one of the very few historians from my past.

How to get to Heaven from Scotland …

I was testing children in my Glasgow Sunday School class to see if they understood the concept of getting into heaven.

I asked them, 
“If I sold my house and my car, had a big jumble sale and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?”
“NO!” the children answered.

“If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the garden and kept everything tidy, would that get me into heaven?”
Again, the answer was ‘No!’

By now I was starting to smile.
“Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave sweeties to all the children, and loved my husband, would that get me into heaven?”
Again, they all answered ‘No!’

I was just bursting with pride for them.
I continued, “Then how can I get into heaven?”

A six year old boy shouted,  
“Yuv goat tae be fukin’ deid”

Kinda brings a wee tear tae yir e’e….

Posted in Humor, My Life | Tags: Glasgow Sunday School, NO |
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